Ahhh, I look so relaxed in this photo, don’t I?  This was taken on the very first day of 2017.  I took it myself, and the truth is this:  I was anything BUT relaxed.  At the time, I was dating a man who was on an extended trip to Italy, and he pretty much never had time for me unless he was treating me like a phone sex operator.  Oh…and I had just discovered that he had a girlfriend/fiancé back in Italy, and he had been cheating on her the entire time he’d been dating me here in the states.  So yeaaaaaaaah.  That was fun.  Not long after I took this photo, I made sure I was single.

Fast forward to today — December 31, 2017, the very last day of the year.  And how am I now?  Not much better.  I have pneumonia.  Damn PNEUMONIA.  Because of a man.  A few weeks ago, a guy showed up to our first date with a cold.  That’s just tactless.  Any thoughtful person would have rescheduled the meeting for another time rather than expose someone else to their cold.  I mean, even if it doesn’t progress into a worse illness, a cold – in and of itself – is just MISERABLE.  Who would want to pass that on to other people???  But I, being predictably “too nice”, went along with the date anyway, when I should have been like, “HOLD THE FUCKING PHONE.  I DON’T THINK SO.”  Anyway, a couple of days after exposure, I DID get his cold.  But since I’ve been stressed and overworked (and since my immune system had already been weakened by a prior cold in late Oct/early Nov), this cold was harder for me to beat.  It settled into my chest and became an infection – a bad one.  And bacterial infection became…what felt like death.  So I finally ended up going to emergency, receiving intravenous fluids, getting stuck with a needle full of steroids, and all manner of nonsense.  Now, I’m on antibiotics and other meds, patiently waiting to feel like a healthy and normal human being again.

In summary:  one man spoiled the beginning of my year, and another man spoiled the end of my year.  But NO ONE ruined my year…because despite these hellacious bookends of 2017, most of the year was blissfully man-free, and therefore pain-free.

And I was unbelievably happy.  🙂

I had many adventures, tried new things, learned my worth, traveled to Europe, and walked away from a near-death experience appreciating everything more than I ever thought I could.

How lucky I am.  And oh, how much I’ve learned during this glorious, complicated life.

Before I share some of my favorite photos & moments of 2017, how about another New Year’s blast from the past…

This is me on the first day of the year 1996.  I was 20 years old and a junior in college.  Six months later – to the day – I would be married.  A few months after that, I would be pregnant with my first and only child.  Woah.  I was just a baby myself.

How strange it is to look back on each year, on all the years, on the people we used to be.  I feel as though I’ve lived so many lifetimes already.  As Joan Didion said, “We forget all too soon the things we thought we could never forget…forget what we whispered and what we screamed, forget who we were.  I have already lost touch with a couple of people I used to be.”

So let’s wrap it up like a big ‘ole gift and set it aside for good…the year

2017

**NOTE:  I always listen to music as I create.  If you want to share in the feeling/experience that I was having as I typed this blog and said goodbye to 2017, put on “Mysterium”, by the band Hammock, and listen to it on a loop as you roll through the photos…

Can You Dig It?

Arkansas has many treasures buried underground, and it can be a lot of fun digging to find them.  I’ve visited the diamond mine in Murfreesboro several times, but it wasn’t until this year that I visited the crystal mine in Jessieville…

 

I got a kick out of this photo, because I thought the guy in profile looked like the Marlboro man or some cowboy straight out of the Wild West.

For a small fee, you are set loose amidst acres and mountains of earth that you can dig and sift through at your leisure.  If you get tired or bored, there’s a snack bar, a gift shop, and even (if you’re more adventurous) a zip-line across a ravine.

Above:  a few of the crystals I found, still covered in dirt. After washing them, they turn bright, clear, and shining. They may not be as precious as our diamonds, but they are still lovely pieces of our state’s geological history. If you ever visit “The Natural State”, be sure to stop by one of our mines and take a shining bit of Arkansas home with you.

A Unique Performance Opportunity

In March, I was asked to perform one of my poems set to jazz.  The two men accompanying me would be:   1) my talented friend Chuck Dodson on keyboards.  2) Rafael Gayol, who had been Leonard Cohen’s drummer.

Jeeeez….how could a girl say no to THAT?

So I got up there and read a poem about a stray cat, and I even asked the audience to meow.  They obliged, and everyone had a good time…

The venue was “South on Main”, in Little Rock, Arkansas.

I was just thankful to perform with these two celebrated musicians in such a wonderful location.  Also?…South on Main staff:  your food, drinks, and service are off-the-charts AMAZING.

Birthday Girl

A lot of people have asked me what I did for my 42nd Birthday.  I spent it alone — it was peaceful and perfect.  I went away to a secret cabin in the woods near a lake, right here in Arkansas…

 

I stayed in the cabin for a few days.  About half of my time was spent in or near the water.  The other half was spent reading/writing in the cabin.  I even brought my typewriter along…

Above:  one of the poems I wrote while on my little retreat.

Below:  after-bath mirror selfie.

What a lovely place…I think I’ll visit again in the future.  There’s nothing I love more than a secret hideaway in nature.

 The Piggott, Arkansas / Ernest Hemingway Trip

I mentioned in an earlier blog that famed writer Ernest Hemingway used to spend a lot of time right here in Arkansas.  His second wife, Pauline Pfeiffer, was from the small, northeastern town of Piggott.  Here’s how the city looks today…

Tiny, colorful, charming.

My first night, I stayed at “The Inn at Piggott” (pictured below), which used to be the original Bank of Piggott, built in 1925.  The building has been renovated into beautiful rooms and suites, each with a different décor/theme.

I stayed in the “Pauline Room”:

 Above:  oh my goodness…REAL KEYS.

Below:  when I told the staff that I was vegan, they didn’t make fun of me or give me a hard time.  They were sweet and accommodating.  I told them, “Just toast and peanut butter and some fruit would be fine”.  So that’s what they brought out the next morning, just for me…

Bless them.  ❤

Above:  in a bubble.

Below:  on my dresser–just a Lana Del Rey album, a mini traveling gnome, a two dollar bill…you know.  The usual.

Okay, so you’re probably wondering about the Pfeiffer-Hemingway House — the place where Ernest spent much of his time living and working.  Let’s go…

The most exciting part for me was seeing where he’d written some of my favorite works, including a large part of the novel, “A Farewell to Arms”.

The Pfeiffer family turned the barn in the backyard into a studio for Ernest, and this is where he did his writing…

Okay, this wall is hard for a vegan and animal lover to look at.  Big Papa Hemingway REALLY liked to hunt–one of the things about him that I DON’T like.  Oh, the horror. 

But DAMN, the dude could write.

True Hemingway fans will know that this set-up (above) is actually incorrect.  Hemingway didn’t use a chair when he wrote.  After several injuries and two plane crashes, Ernest couldn’t sit for long periods of time — it hurt too much.  He actually placed his typewriter on the taller ledge (behind this table), and he wrote while standing up.  The tour guide confirmed this during my visit.

After a tour of the Hemingway-Pfeiffer House and Ernest’s studio, I went for a bite to eat at a local Mexican restaurant (quite good), then I checked in at my second overnight location, this time at a place called Rose Dale Farm.

And not only did I get the 100 year old house to myself…I got the entire farm:

 

Above:  looking out over the beautiful land that I had to myself for the evening and the next day.  I’m not much of a farmer, so what exactly would I try to raise up on this land?

The ghost of Ernest Hemingway, of course.  He used to visit this home, and I was about to attempt to conjure him…in my own way.

Farmer Jenn.

Inside the house…

Above:  THIS is the place where the real magic happened.  This is the desk (called a “secretary”) where Hemingway used to sit and talk with the owners, drinking his bourbon.

When I first let myself in the house, I found the keys to the place on the counter, along with this note:

And there they are, in the light — the drink rings left by Ernest Hemingway himself.  Messy drunk that he was, God bless him.

So in the middle of the night, I seated myself at this desk.  I drank bourbon (of course), raised my glass in a toast to Ernest, and wrote a poem:  “Drinking with Ernest Hemingway”.

Those of you who attend my upcoming feature poetry performance in Hot Springs will hear its debut.

Those who can’t attend  — I MIGHT record myself reading this (or another) poem, and put it on YouTube.  MAYBE.  Just maybe.

Snapshots of Sweden:  Malmö

I made two blogs all about Copenhagen, but I thought I’d share a few photos of another fascinating city that I visited while I was in Europe:  Malmö, Sweden…

To get to Malmö from Copenhagen, you can travel by train on the marvelous Oresund Bridge, which tunnels UNDER the sea as well as over it (above).  Amazing.  And it only takes a little over 20 minutes.

I emerged in Malmö Central Station (below), which is always buzzing with people and activity.  A beautiful facility…

After visiting the ATM and getting some Swedish currency, it was time to head out into another Scandinavian country for the first time…

By now, you’re probably noticing a common thread that runs through Malmö and Copenhagen (as well as other Scandinavian cities) — that perfect mix of historical structures and sleek, modern design.  Yep.

Below:  I kept threatening to buy these shoes for Lana (and make her wear them around town)…

I didn’t know which I found funnier…the Utfart! signs that were everywhere, or “Shawarma King”…

Above:  one of my favorite Swedish bands!  Shout Out Louds would be performing in the city…but alas, I was about a month too early.  😦

Below:  something cozy they do outside Scandinavian restaurants…scattering outdoor heaters amongst the tables, as well as placing blankets on the chairs so patrons can bundle up if they wish.  I love it…

My blanket.

And my meal.

Ohhhhhhhhh, and how did I forget to talk about coffee in my Danish blogs?!?!?!   Coffee is like…my LIFE.  And both Copenhagen and Malmö had several excellent cafes.

In Malmö…

Above:  in Sweden, a big ball and an espresso.  That’s another thing I noticed in both Sweden & Denmark…their obsession with BALLS.

Below:  BALLS in Denmark…

These countries REALLLLLLLY like their ball-shaped candies and pastries.  Strange Obsession.  Tasty, though.  #truth

Alrighty…I’ll wrap up this blog, as it will take you until 2019 to read it if I don’t stop.

So, what did I learn in 2017?

1.  I need to stop being “too nice”, and I must ALWAYS stand up for what I deserve.
2. In 42.5 years, I STILL haven’t met a man who treats me decently — with any regularity.  And I’ve come to terms with the fact that I probably never will.  Which is fine, because…
3. I am COMPLETELY happy being by myself and making my way. #SelfSufficient #Confident #Strong #Independent #EnjoyingFreedom
4. There are so many wonderful places to explore on this planet, and I can’t wait to see more of them.
5. I’ve got some really big plans for 2018 *rubs hands together and grins*…and if you stick around, you might get to see some interesting shit.
6. I am grateful for YOU, readers — ALL of you, no matter what part of the planet you are on right now as you read this.

BONUS

I’m always hearing that I look MISERABLE in my photographs, and it’s true…I can’t stand to have my picture taken, and most photographers are just horrible and annoying. To catch a real smile from me, you have to be sneaky and quick, and I have to be TRULY happy…not faking it. Since most people in cyberspace have never seen a genuine smile from me, I’m going to give you a surprise. An end-of-the-year present. This is me, with my little sister…SMILING:

Hell just froze over, ladies and gentlemen. 😀

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Until next time,

Jenn ❤